✨️ Life lately - raw and real ✨️

It’s been a heavy few weeks — months really — and I’ve been meaning to write this not just to share what’s going on, but also to remind anyone feeling the same that you’re not alone.

I was recently diagnosed with BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder). Finally putting a name to the way I’ve felt for so long has been both a relief and overwhelming. I’ve just started switching mental health meds, which is its own emotional rollercoaster. I’m currently in that in-between phase — waiting to be stable enough to start therapy, yet craving the support it could offer now.

On top of that, I’m juggling ongoing court stuff with my boys' dad. It’s draining, frustrating, and exhausting. I’m trying to show up every day for my kids while being dragged into situations that constantly trigger me. It’s like walking through a storm with no umbrella.

We’ve got a holiday coming up — something that should feel exciting, but instead has my anxiety dialled up to 100. Travelling with an autistic 3-year-old and a baby isn’t your typical relaxing break. It means prepping for meltdowns, overstimulation, routine changes, and doing everything I can to keep them safe, calm, and happy while not losing myself in the process.

Then there’s the heat. Normally I’d love a bit of sunshine, but with the new meds in my system it feels like I’m constantly melting from the inside out. Sweaty, snappy, sleep-deprived — it’s all part of the glamorous behind-the-scenes right now.

And yet… I’m still here. Still showing up. Still fighting through the fog. I’m learning to give myself grace — that I don’t need to be “perfect” to be a good mum, or to matter, or to deserve rest. Some days are pure survival mode, and that’s okay too.

If you're reading this and feel like everything is "a bit much" right now — I see you. We're doing our best, and some days, that is enough.